By definition, the work therapists do requires our clients to be vulnerable in ways that they probably never experience otherwise in their lives — most clients know this well! What we are all perhaps less familiar with is the ways in which our role requires vulnerability of the therapist as well. In his quintessential work, On Being a Therapist, Dr. Jeffrey Kottler reports that some researchers have wondered whether “therapists are masochists and gluttons for punishment. What else could possibly explain our willingness to spend...read more
When we suffer a loss, all of a sudden a million things demand our attention: making arrangements, handling business, making sure the children are ok and dealing with our own feelings of grief and loss. It’s easy during these stressful times to forget to take care of ourselves. We may think we’re doing fine because we are still getting through the day. Suffering a loss is one of the most emotionally intense experiences we will ever face. Grief affects us emotionally, physically, spiritually, mentally and socially. Your strength will be called...read more
I’ve been a little depressed lately.
Wait…did I say that out loud?
Doesn’t matter. It’s true either way. That’s right. I’m a therapist, and I’ve been depressed lately. It’s actually remarkable how predictable this sort of thing is for me.
Did you see us in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch this week? We were there! Change, Inc. Founder and Clinical and Managing Director, Ryan Thomas Neace, was featured in an article discussing the impact of online behavior in relationships! Click here to...read more
Thinking positively about the people in our lives acknowledges that they have flaws and faults which may have an impact on us, and allows us to make informed decisions about how to interact while still choosing to think of them positively. We do this by learning to expect nothing more than what they are capable of, and allowing ourselves the privilege of feeling warmly toward them about that helpful portion, however small it may be. There is no need for anger or frustration about the rest — we no longer expect it of them and trust them...read more
I reached the apex of my childhood popularity in eighth grade, having rotated into the “most sought after guy” slot relatively frequently to that point with a handful of two or three others.
Then something happened.read more
Most of us having trouble saying we’re sorry. If some of our nation’s politicians (or the way we react to them) are any indication, apologizing is practically un-American. It runs against the grain of a people who’ve prided themselves on being first place at everything (even though we’re not – pride makes you blind that way).read more
Every year, phone calls pour in to Change, Inc. Nashville & St. Louis inquiring about referring some family member or loved one. You know – wayward children, beloved siblings, aging parents, etc. Many times, the callers are so concerned they’re considering paying for a beneficiary’s therapy themselves. In principle, gifting counseling services to a loved one is a sound proposition, but before you go blindly referring, here are few things to consider.read more
I love the new year.
I feel fresh and alive and ready to tackle anything that comes my way.
And while this is SUPER COMMON (I know I’m not alone here), the flip side of feeling this way is that I often try to do too much…then end up doing nothing.
I’ve worked on this for the past few years and here are 5 tips drawn from how I’m approaching things this year.read more
Whether we’re celebrating Advent, Hanukah, Kwanzaa, the arrival of Saint Nick, or good old-fashioned family-togetherness, it’s only natural that we look forward to this time of year with hope and eagerness in our hearts.
But sometimes all of that hope and eagerness can begin to look an awful lot like expectations. You know, the kind that inevitably lead to disappointment, frustration, or sadness. They seem especially potent around the holidays.read more